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The Kids Are Alright

November 25, 2010 By Marta Darby 3 Comments

My kids are all gone this Thanksgiving weekend. And I'm okay with that. No, really. I am O-KAY.

I don't know when this cataclysmic change happened inside of me. But I know that it did.

Adam, whom I haven't seen for months because he moved to Northern California, was here for a few days and took Lucy and Jonathan back with him and Stephanie to Redding. They are spending Thanksgiving there and flying home on Monday.

And I'm okay with that.

Amy is spending Thanksgiving with her aging grandparents (the biological's folks) and is cooking an entire Thanksgiving feast at their home.

And I'm okay with that. In fact, I love it. I love that she wanted to bless her grandparents and do for them what they can't easily do for themselves anymore. I am quite proud of her.

I'm delighted that Adam wanted to have Lucy and Jon with him and that he took the week off to spend time with them and show them off to his new friends and introduce them to his new town. And I love that they were so happy to get to spend time with their big brother.

"This is sooo not Cuban,"  I thought to myself. I should be guilt-tripping them into being with Mami on This Most Glorious of All Holidays.

But instead I am happy. And proud. (WHO AM I??)

I got to have all four of them with me for breakfast on Wednesday before they all took off and commenced with their Thanksgiving plans that do not include Eric and me.

And it was enough.

Amy Lucy Jon

Amy, Lucy & Jon.

Me Adam Steph

Me, Adam, and Stephanie.

Weird, right? It was quite a surprise to me, too. I think that what I'm feeling might be peace. It's a new and unusual (and not very Cuban) feeling and I'm still sorting it out.

Eric and I will be spending Thanksgiving with his family and I will miss the fabulous comelata (loosely translated: eat-a-thon) that will be happening with the rest of my big, fat, Cuban family.

And I'm okay with that, too.

Of course, this may be just a passing phase. It may be seasonal. Or it may just be because I'm just tired. I don't know. And frankly, it doesn't matter.

So what if we won't be sharing a turkey one day of one year?  My worth as their mother doesn't come from the photo-op around the table. (Don't get me wrong….you know I love a beautifully set and bountiful table and I love when my house is full and noisy, but that's not important right now.)

I will definitely miss them, but I'm quite pleased with the people they have become and are becoming.

And for that I am truly thankful.

Happy Thanksgiving, my friends.

You might also like:

Everyone’s Invited Giving Thanks. A lo Cubano. Venus and Mars are alright tonight Dating my kids

Filed Under: Celebrate, My Kids, Thanksgiving Tagged With: comelatas, Cuban thanksgiving, Thanksgiving

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Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Maria Aguirre says

    November 25, 2010 at 9:08 am

    Dear Marta,I think you should be very proud of the wonderful, loving children you have raised. We were all raised with Cuban guilt and I think that is one tradition we should not hand down to the subsequent generation. Our goal as parents should be to create kind, happy people that reach their fullest potential and then go forth and create their own life, (hopefully, including us in it from time to time, lol). I think your children are on that path. Remember, “los hijos son prestados.” Happy Thanksgiving!!

    Reply
  2. Ody Fabregas says

    November 25, 2010 at 10:33 am

    There is no better feeling than peace.I’m so very thankful you are in my life!
    Happy Thanksgiving my friend.
    Besote!!! Ody

    Reply
  3. Rhonda says

    November 28, 2010 at 9:29 am

    You’ve done an excellent job raising your family and your enthusiasm is wonderful. Sometimes it is good to step back, breathe and just relax. You deserve it!

    Reply

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Marta Verdes Darby is a Cuban-American food blogger in South Orange County.

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