My Big Fat Cuban Family: A Cuban-American Blog

Gratuitous Photos of My Four Kids

All my creative energy is going into my kitchen remodel. Well, most of it.

Another high percentage of my creative energy is going into designing sets and costumes for the high school production of Grease (Jonathan will be playing the role of Sonny).

And did I mention that we've torn up the downstairs bathroom? Probably not, because I'm kind enough to spare the internet from enjoying photos of my discarded toilet in the side yard and my bombed-out-looking-bathroom. You're welcome.

All that to say this: I'm having trouble stringing two words together to make a sentence because my right brain has taken charge over my entire being and is diverting all energy to sets, costumes, kitchen, and bath (not necessarily in that order).

And did I mention that I'm mostly "visual?"

So I thought I'd just post some photos of my kids today.

1. Because they make me happy.
2. Because these photos perfectly captured their relationships and personalities.
3. Because I can. ;-)

Lucy & Adam. He was seven when she was born and that was upsetting to him for a while.

He's obviously over it.

Now it's like they share a brain.

Amy Kikita really, really wanted her Ruby-Slippers-on-Crack in the photos.

I told her she didn't have to be so dramatic.

That's my girl!

Theirs is the perfect love/hate sibling relationship.

My girls, in spite of the 10 year age difference, are friends. That makes me happy.

Jonathan and Adam are working hard to perfect their smolder.

But, I like their happy faces better.

These two sometimes act like they're twins.

Lucy just really, really wanted her harlequin tights to be documented.

I really, really miss having Adam around.

Because he always makes us laugh.

And laugh.

Jonathan and Amy. He's sixteen. She's twenty-eight. But they share a love for Battlestar Gallactica and Dr. Who. Go figure.

I love that they were all wearing red and black and looked all color-coordinated. (It was Christmas.)

I love when they are all together and making each other laugh.

They are all so different and yet so very much alike. One thing I know for sure, when they smile....I can't deny any of them.

Thanks for your attention. Now it's back to my kitchen and bathroom and Greasers and Pink Ladies. I may yet post photos of my discarded toilet, but that's not important right now. ;-)

The Biggest Insult

My kids are generally pretty nice to each other. Of course, there are the occasional sibling fights that crop up when someone's in a foul mood or has had a bad day and chooses to take it out on those closest to them.

For the most part, they get along great and are friends. The exception being that the older ones would take advantage of the gulibility of the younger ones and taunt them whenever they had the chance. They're still doing this (but that's not important right now).

This usually happened at the dinner table and it went something like this:

• One of the two younger ones, usually Jonathan, tells some sort of joke.
• One of the other siblings: "That's not funny."

This became the biggest insult in our home... for years. "That's not funny," or even worse, "You're not funny."

The highest praise in our family is to get a laugh. So then, the highest goal (especially at dinner time) became to make the other siblings think something was funny. Extra points if you could make them accidentally spit food or pass a liquid through their nose. (I know. Terrible mother. Shut up.)

Believe me, this can be a tough crowd.

Once the Biggest Insult was out there, the un-funny one, sometimes Lucy, but most of the time, Jonathan would kind of do an emotional retreat and come out swinging the next time.

This scene repeated itself over and over on through the years and on many occasions. But, as Nietzsche once famously stated, "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger." This has been proven true in our quest for the dinner table laugh.

Fast forward to present day. My kids have been hanging with friends and playing Improvisation games for a long time now - it's what all the cool homeschool kids were doing, at least at our house. As an aside, I think each of them has an extremely well-developed sense of humor. I know I'm the mom here, but I promise, it's true.

A couple of years ago, Adam began teaching an Improv class at their high school. Lucy did it last year and this year, Jon collected a group of students to perform as a fundraiser for their drama program.

I know he's my son and everything, but I can genuinely say this with no equivocation: HE. IS. FUNNY.

I guess all that dinner table abuse really paid off. ;-)

For the love of Belle - Beauty and the Beast in 3D

When my daughter, Amy Kikita was young, she was completely enamored with The Little Mermaid, as probably most 7 year olds were at the time. Ariel was spunky for a princess and went after what she wanted. I think she identified with those qualities.

Years later, Disney gave us Beauty and the Beast and when it was available on VHS, we promptly procured a copy and our sweet Lucy had found that Belle was a princess who had qualities she could admire.

My mom calls Lucy, "La Bella Lucy." And our Master Teacher throughout our homeschool years always called her "Lucy Belle." Coincidence?

I think not.

We had seen the stage show, Beauty and the Beast last year, but last week I was invited by Disney Pictures to the El Capitan Theater in Hollywood to experience Disney's Beauty and the Beast in 3D and I couldn't have stopped Lucy from joining me if I had wanted to. She was out-of-her-skin excited with the prospect of finally seeing the drama played out on the big screen. Not to mention that we just both happen to love being on Hollywood's Walk of Fame.

Check out the look on her face. Can't you just see her excitement?

Because it was Disney, and because it was at the El Capitan, we were treated to an amazing organist who played every song from the movie as we all took our places. (Totally made me happy.)

Then, Belle and the Beast came out to dance and welcome the audience along with canon blasts of rose petals. (Oh, yes!)

We got to don our 3D glasses, which I'm starting to kind of like. (I know. Shut up.)

And were treated to the new Disney short Tangled Ever After - The Rings, which was absolutely hysterical. Here's a preview:

When the movie began, we quietly sang along to each familiar song and even though we knew the movie by heart, decided that it was absolutely worth seeing it on the big screen. (The Tangled Ever After short was seriously laugh-out-loud funny. Almost worth the price of admission, but that's not important right now.)

And because I'm a big, sentimental uber-geek, I sat there thinking how cool it was to be sitting with a fully grown-up Miss Lucy Belle and enjoying that piece of her childhood as it came to life before us. And, okay...I might have wiped away a tear or two. (But I'll deny it if you tell anyone.)

I encourage you, if you've only seen the small screen version of Beauty and the Beast, or haven't seen it in all its glory, to find a theater playing Beauty and the Beast in 3D in your own town. It's playing in selected theaters opening this coming weekend, January 13th and runs through February 2nd. I swear you don't want to miss it.

And then, because the story is set in France....we ate crepes...

...and we lived happily ever after. ;-)

Did you see Beauty and the Beast back in the day? Are you planning on seeing it again this time around? Tell me.

{Disclosure: Disney Pictures invited us to the pre-screening of Beauty and the Beast 3D. The opinions about the show are my own and the crepes were delicious, but that's not important right now.}

Everything I wished for...

Happy New Year, everyone!

I know some of you are wondering what happened with the Dark Christmas Tree. 

Here's the story:

My son, Adam flew in from the Bay Area at the crack of dawn, landing at around 7:30 AM on Christmas eve. Lucy and Jonathan went to pick him up at the airport while Eric and I finished up the last minute touches around here. Or maybe we just slept in, but that's not important right now. ;-)

And they were all exhausted so they napped for most of the day which was fine by me. We had an amazing NocheBuena celebration at my sister, Alina's house. Everything was so beautiful and festive and everyone was so happy. (We also did a photobooth thing again which I'll share with you later.)

In short, a good time was had by all.

We didn't get home until about 11pm. It was then that we busted out the Créme de Vie and cranked up the Christmas music and decorated our own tree and put out the presents and set the table for breakfast.

Christmas morning felt pretty magical and I think we all felt it. (I made them put the lights on the tree in a swirling light pattern. You can see it if you squint. I kind of loved it. A lot.)

We had an absolute feast on Christmas morning that included quiche, fresh fruit, monkey bread and my best friend, Pam's Pamagranate Jelly.

Seriously, the house went from plain to spectacular fabulous magical (=D) overnight.

And as we leisurely had breakfast and opened gifts... (lots and lots of gifts. Thanks, guys!)

I felt absolutely content. We had a wonderful time together and all 6 of us were in the same area code. 

Which is all I really wanted for Christmas anyway. 

Just Jon

I was hoping to have something profound to say about my youngest son, Jonathan turning 16 today. I wanted to compare and contrast the kid he was,

to the man he's become.

I wanted to write about what a decent person he's grown up to be. I wanted to tell you about the many qualities that he's developed that make him a great guy. I'm trying to take a step back and take myself out of the equation and assess him as objectively as possible (although I'd love to take credit for how awesome he turned out, but that's not important right now).

As I observe my youngest today on his 16th birthday, here's what I know for sure:

1. Jonathan is his own person. 
2. He is a wonderful friend.
3. He has a caring heart.
4. He's got a highly developed sense of humor.
5. He is thoughtful.
6. He is tough.
7. He is talented.
8. And humble.
9. He's a natural born leader.
10. He's comfortable in his own skin.
11. Jonathan is the kind of guy that friends call when they need something.
12. He is respected by his peers and by the adults in his life.
13. He is compassionate.
14. He is sensitive.
15. He is smart.
16. He has big thoughts.

When you meet Jonathan and get to know him, you will eventually detect all those qualities, but like everyone else in his life, you will say, "That's just Jon."

And that's the highest compliment of all. 

Happy birthday, my son. I love you MORE.

 

(NOTE: The photo of Jon today was taken by his talented photographer friend, Chase Miller.)

The Dark Christmas Tree

It's December the 24th and my Christmas tree is finally up. But there are no ornaments on it.

My friends tease me because I don't like to decorate my home for Christmas very early in the month of December. In the Christmases of my youth, we would always wait until Christmas eve to decorate the tree. There's nothing like feeling the season when you're hanging ornaments, listening to carols, sipping creme de vie and smelling the intoxicating smell of the pork roasting all day in all of the garlicky goodness that is our Cuban Nochebuena.

So I like to wait. It's not that I don't love Christmas. I totally do. I love everything about it. 

And it's not like I haven't been busy. I finished all my shopping by the first week of December (thank you, Cyber Monday). 

We (by "we," I mean Lucy) have made vats of creme de vie. It's all been bottled and tagged and delivered to our friends. This includes my dearest Desi Arnaz Jr. (see photo below). *sigh*

(I'm kind of in love with my tags this year, but that's not important right now.)

This past week I have been busy hanging our Christmas stockings, by the chimney with care, of course. ;-)

I have already given my girls their traditional matching Christmas PJs.

This week I also stocked my hutch with my favorite Christmas dishes.

We (again, by "we," I mean Lucy) have made countless Peanut Butter Kiss Cookies. (That also means we have eaten countless Peanut Butter Kiss Cookies, but that's not important right now.)

I edited and packaged our annual Christmas video and a family keepsake photo album of the highlights of everyone's year. They are all wrapped, tagged, and ready to give to the rest of the family tonight at our annual Nochebuena celebration.

The kids made our annual run to Porto's already this morning. (25 tamales, 25 croquetas de jamón, 25 pastelitos de guayaba, 25 pastelitos de coco, 25 pastelitos de guayaba y queso, 4 loaves of Cuban bread, a dozen papas rellenas, and some steak sandwiches to get us through the day. =D)

But it's already noon on Christmas Eve, and my Christmas tree is still not decorated. And I'm okay with that.

Let me explain. My son, Adam, just got home today. Happily, he'll be with us for the rest of the week. He arrived on the o-dark-hundred flight from San Francisco and barely slept last night. He's here and napping now.

He was so looking forward to coming home for Christmas and he wouldn't be putting up a Christmas tree in his world. And so, I am completely content to wait with that dark tree in my living room.

When Adam wakes up from his nap, we will hang the ornaments, listen to Christmas Carols, sip some creme de vie, and enjoy the intoxicating smell of the garlicky goodness that is our Cuban Nochebuena.

I'll be reminded of the Christmases of my childhood and we will have made a memory. Isn't that what Christmas is all about?

Feliz Navidad, my friends!

The Great Christmas Card Challenge of 2011

I love the tradition of exchanging Christmas cards. I don't know if my parents ever sent out Christmas greetings, but I remember being 18 years old and buying my first pack of Christmas cards. My family had just moved to Orange County from the Los Angeles area where I had left all of my old friends. 

It was 1973 and I was still regularly communicating with them via U.S. mail. So sending Christmas greetings seemed to be a very natural thing.

In 1976 my local one-hour photo booth started offering Photo Holiday Greetings. I jumped on that one immediately and have never missed a year. I, personally, love getting Photo Christmas cards. I love seeing friends change from year to year. I love watching their families grow and their kids change. I save each and every one in that year's Christmas album. 

This year, I was looking for a photo to use for our card. I take thousands of photos so that shouldn't be too difficult. Except for the fact that I wanted something with all 6 of us in it. And Adam lives somewhere at the top of California, 12 hours away. What to do?

I found a photo of all 6 of us from Lucy's graduation which I kind of adored. 

I was happy with how we all looked and I thought our personalities totally showed through and as you can see, we were all in it. But Lucy vetoed it because she has since cut her hair short and that photo was "sooo last year." (Technically, it was this year, and she's actually talking about the school year calendar, but that's not important right now.)

I also really love this one from when Adam came down to visit on Easter. How cute are we?

But again, Lucy and the short hair thing. I have no photos of the six of us together and Lucy's short hair. What to do?

I had to design my own, of course.

Hey, I'm Cuban. I'm all about "resolviendo.*"  (*that's the Cuban way to say "improvising.") 

Merry Christmas from the Darbys! 

Teaching Generosity?

As you know if you've been reading this blog for a while, we have homeschooled our kids. I often say that one of the reasons we have chosen to homeschool is that we're not as concerned about their academics as we are concerned about their character.

We have attempted to teach them kindness, thoughtfulness, hospitality, and generosity - high values for us - mostly by modeling them as best as we know how. Because, seriously, has anyone ever learned these kinds of things by being lectured?

During this time of year we love participating in Samaritan's Purse Operation Christmas Child in which we thoughtfully and lovingly fill up a shoe box with gifts for a child on the other side of the world. We pray for our small recipient as we do so. We look forward to this small act of charity every year.

We get to go and shop for little items to put into the shoeboxes. As we're shopping, we think about what would bring a child joy.

"These trucks, Mom. I would have liked them as an 8 year old. Very cool."

"Let's get this little doll with an extra outfit. I think she's very sweet."

"Crayons! Modeling clay! Watercolors! YES!"

Shoeboxes are collected at various churches all over the country and then packed and disbursed to different places to kids around the world. What's very cool about this is that we get to track our shoebox to see where it ends up

From the Samaritan's Purse Website:

National Collection Week: November 14 - 21

Use an empty shoe box (standard size, please) or a small plastic container. You can wrap the box (lid separately), but wrapping is not required. Most importantly, pray for the child who will receive your gift.

Determine whether your gift will be for a boy or a girl, and the child’s age category: 2-4, 5-9, or 10-14. Print out the appropriate boy/girl label by downloading the artwork to the right. Mark the correct age category on the label, and tape the label to the top of your box.

Fill the box with a variety of gifts that will bring delight to a child. 

Please donate $7 or more for each shoe box you prepare to help cover shipping and other project costs. You can give online by using our “Follow Your Box Donation” option, or you can write a check to Samaritan’s Purse (note “OCC” on memo line) and place it in an envelope on top of the gift items inside your box. If you or your family are preparing more than one shoe box, please make one combined donation.

Place a rubber band around each closed shoe box and drop off at the Collection Center nearest you during our collection week, November 14-21.

For locations and hours of collection visit our Drop-Off Locations page where you can find the nearest place to take your shoe box by entering your ZIP Code or you can call 1-800-353-5949.

You can also send your shoe box gift to:
Samaritan’s Purse
Operation Christmas Child
801 Bamboo Road
Boone, NC 28607

*********************************************************

Our kids have all grown up to be very generous people. I say this, not to brag but as a matter of record. Apparently the lessons were picked up somehow. My theory, then is correct. Character values are more "caught than taught."

Do you support any charities? Tell me.

{Disclaimer: Samaritan's Purse is a charity we believe in and support. I have not received any compensation from them to write this post. It's my privilege and pleasure to tell you about them.}

No "El Tri-co-tri" for you!

My mom calls.

"Van a ir al tri-co-tri?" She's asking if the kids are going out and Trick or Treating.

El Tri-co-tri. You have to say it phonetically, TREE-COH-TREE. It's what Trick or Treat sounds like with a Cuban accent. The "El" is just to make it grammatically correct. 

El Tri-co-tri. Noun. (Or verb?) The act of dressing up and begging for candy from your neighbors. (Must be a verb.)

No, I sigh. I think they're too old for El Tri-co-tri.

But I love the decorations and I love a good party. And one of them suggested a Nightmare Before Christmas Theme and then it kind of took on a life of its own.

I was in charge of food and decorations, because that's what I do best, but that's not important right now.

I decided to do it all in Tim-Burtony-inspired black and white.

I created the Nightmare Before Christmas silouettes as Photoshop Brushes and pasted them onto paper plates. I think they look very cool if you don't get too close.

I went to a local thrift store and grabbed some black picture frames which made me happy because I was feeling lazier than usual and didn't feel like painting them. (I know. Shut up.)

Then I made the Halloween Subway Art in Photoshop and just printed it out to fit the 8 x 10 frame.

And I messed with a photo of our black cat, Bastet. I really like the look in her eyes.

I painted some pumpkins with black acrylic paint, because again, I was too lazy to carve them. (Don't judge me.)

And voila! Insta-Halloween decorations! *takes bow* 

Here's Jonathan explaining what they decided to do instead of El Tri-co-tri.

It makes me happy to see them all dressed up and having fun.  

Sally and Jack Skellington:

Amy Kikita as a Golden Goddess. Here she is in her Divine Form:

The Mayor and the Corpse Bride:

Edward Scissorhands (pretty awesome, no?):

Lock, Shock, and Barrel:

Victoria (the live bride from the Corpse Bride):

Here they all are in all their black and white glory:

So, a good time was had by all, and even if they didn't get to go do "El Tri-co-tri..."

They did get to enjoy some fabulous Cuban food. ;-)

Japi Jalouin! Have fun with El Tri-co-tri!

 

The Circle of Life - Lion King 3D and Eternal Disney Uber-geeks

Back in 1994, I took Amy and Adam to the premiere of the Disney film, The Lion King at the El Capitan Theatre in Hollywood. This was obviously before Lucy and Jonathan were born. We all loved the film so much that we couldn't wait to own it when it was released on VHS. (Yes, this is waaay back in the day.)

A few years later, when we added two more little ones to our family, our love for The Lion King never diminished.

When my son, Jonathan, was very little, he loved watching Disney's The Lion King on our VHS player. He's almost 16 now and I imagine that like most of his generation, they grew up watching Simba grow from cub to king and knew every moment of the film and every song by heart.

In the first scene, when all the animals come to the presentation of Simba, Jonathan would stretch his arms out for someone (usually me - Wait! Would that then make me the monkey??) to pick him up and "present" him. He would usually signal his older siblings to bow down, and to my endless astonishment and to their everlasting credit, they always did.

We've also enjoyed watching the live musical production of The Lion King. Seriously, so much love for this movie and show.

Last week I had the opportunity to attend a preview screening of The Lion King 3D at the Walt Disney Studio Lot with my friend, Jana (The Summer House). 

We were wide-eyed and amazed and feeling sooo accidentally cool to be visiting the Walt Disney Studios. You can imagine what that was like for a Disney-uber-geek like myself. (Pinch me!) 

First of all, the film itself (even though I knew every line by heart) stands the test of time. It's completely as fresh and funny and poignant as it was so many years ago. The 3D effects make the scenes just that more thrilling (particularly the wildebeast stampede, but that's not important right now).

Having the privilege of seeing it at the Walt Disney Studios just gave me another thing to put a checkmark next to on my Bucket List. (I'll have to tell you all about it in great detail, but that's a post for another day.)

Do yourself a favor and GO. SEE. THIS. FILM. It's only in theaters for the next two weeks. In 3D, people! (Not the roller-coaster-stomach-churning 3D, the very cool-modern-the-characters-look-so-real 3D.)

Take your kids who were so little when it was released in theaters the first time, so they can enjoy the full effects. Encourage your teenagers and young adults to go see it again on the big screen so they can relive the magic. Seriously. You'll thank me.

As for Jonathan, who wants to one day be a film maker, well.....he just can't wait to be king. ;-)

Do you have some good memories of The Lion King? Please share.