My Big Fat Cuban Family: A Cuban-American Blog

Happy Dia de los Reyes!

Happy Dia de los Reyes. Day of the Three Kings. Day of the Magi.

It's always so strange to try and explain some of our Cuban superstitions traditions. And yes, I know we've been exiled for 50 years now, but some traditions we still keep. Even if they are now mostly just as a nod to our heritage.

Enter the Three Kings. Or the Three Wise Men who showed up at the birth of Jesus to bring him gifts of gold, frankincense and myrrh.

In Cuba, back in the day, they were the ones to bring us our "big" presents. Which would be waiting for us when we woke up on January 6th.

Santa Claus or if you prefer Spanglish, "Santi Clo" was a minor player in the Christmas drama and he brought us some candy or a token to mark the beginning of the REAL 12 Days of Christmas from December 25th through January 5th. (Which is why it's crazy-making to me when people start talking about the 12 days on December 1st, but that's not important right now.)

I've told this story countless times. And while we don't hold fast to the tradition of the 3 Kings bringing the presents, we still keep our tree up at least through today. (We didn't put it up until the 24th - don't freak out! - so we're not even tired of it yet.) And so, we try to keep some of the tradition alive.

My husband, Eric has learned that it's important to me to celebrate Christmas in this time frame and so he enjoys playing along. He has embraced the Cuban Christmas Timeline. And also the "big" gift delivered by the Los Tres Reyes Magos. 

Look at what I found from the Three Kings this morning:

Apparently Gaspar, Melchor and Baltazar are waiting until my kitchen is painted to deliver my set of new kitchen appliances!(YESSSS!!)

I *heart* that man. ;-)

Happy Three Kings Day, everyone!

Everything I wished for...

Happy New Year, everyone!

I know some of you are wondering what happened with the Dark Christmas Tree. 

Here's the story:

My son, Adam flew in from the Bay Area at the crack of dawn, landing at around 7:30 AM on Christmas eve. Lucy and Jonathan went to pick him up at the airport while Eric and I finished up the last minute touches around here. Or maybe we just slept in, but that's not important right now. ;-)

And they were all exhausted so they napped for most of the day which was fine by me. We had an amazing NocheBuena celebration at my sister, Alina's house. Everything was so beautiful and festive and everyone was so happy. (We also did a photobooth thing again which I'll share with you later.)

In short, a good time was had by all.

We didn't get home until about 11pm. It was then that we busted out the Créme de Vie and cranked up the Christmas music and decorated our own tree and put out the presents and set the table for breakfast.

Christmas morning felt pretty magical and I think we all felt it. (I made them put the lights on the tree in a swirling light pattern. You can see it if you squint. I kind of loved it. A lot.)

We had an absolute feast on Christmas morning that included quiche, fresh fruit, monkey bread and my best friend, Pam's Pamagranate Jelly.

Seriously, the house went from plain to spectacular fabulous magical (=D) overnight.

And as we leisurely had breakfast and opened gifts... (lots and lots of gifts. Thanks, guys!)

I felt absolutely content. We had a wonderful time together and all 6 of us were in the same area code. 

Which is all I really wanted for Christmas anyway. 

The Dark Christmas Tree

It's December the 24th and my Christmas tree is finally up. But there are no ornaments on it.

My friends tease me because I don't like to decorate my home for Christmas very early in the month of December. In the Christmases of my youth, we would always wait until Christmas eve to decorate the tree. There's nothing like feeling the season when you're hanging ornaments, listening to carols, sipping creme de vie and smelling the intoxicating smell of the pork roasting all day in all of the garlicky goodness that is our Cuban Nochebuena.

So I like to wait. It's not that I don't love Christmas. I totally do. I love everything about it. 

And it's not like I haven't been busy. I finished all my shopping by the first week of December (thank you, Cyber Monday). 

We (by "we," I mean Lucy) have made vats of creme de vie. It's all been bottled and tagged and delivered to our friends. This includes my dearest Desi Arnaz Jr. (see photo below). *sigh*

(I'm kind of in love with my tags this year, but that's not important right now.)

This past week I have been busy hanging our Christmas stockings, by the chimney with care, of course. ;-)

I have already given my girls their traditional matching Christmas PJs.

This week I also stocked my hutch with my favorite Christmas dishes.

We (again, by "we," I mean Lucy) have made countless Peanut Butter Kiss Cookies. (That also means we have eaten countless Peanut Butter Kiss Cookies, but that's not important right now.)

I edited and packaged our annual Christmas video and a family keepsake photo album of the highlights of everyone's year. They are all wrapped, tagged, and ready to give to the rest of the family tonight at our annual Nochebuena celebration.

The kids made our annual run to Porto's already this morning. (25 tamales, 25 croquetas de jamón, 25 pastelitos de guayaba, 25 pastelitos de coco, 25 pastelitos de guayaba y queso, 4 loaves of Cuban bread, a dozen papas rellenas, and some steak sandwiches to get us through the day. =D)

But it's already noon on Christmas Eve, and my Christmas tree is still not decorated. And I'm okay with that.

Let me explain. My son, Adam, just got home today. Happily, he'll be with us for the rest of the week. He arrived on the o-dark-hundred flight from San Francisco and barely slept last night. He's here and napping now.

He was so looking forward to coming home for Christmas and he wouldn't be putting up a Christmas tree in his world. And so, I am completely content to wait with that dark tree in my living room.

When Adam wakes up from his nap, we will hang the ornaments, listen to Christmas Carols, sip some creme de vie, and enjoy the intoxicating smell of the garlicky goodness that is our Cuban Nochebuena.

I'll be reminded of the Christmases of my childhood and we will have made a memory. Isn't that what Christmas is all about?

Feliz Navidad, my friends!

The Great Christmas Card Challenge of 2011

I love the tradition of exchanging Christmas cards. I don't know if my parents ever sent out Christmas greetings, but I remember being 18 years old and buying my first pack of Christmas cards. My family had just moved to Orange County from the Los Angeles area where I had left all of my old friends. 

It was 1973 and I was still regularly communicating with them via U.S. mail. So sending Christmas greetings seemed to be a very natural thing.

In 1976 my local one-hour photo booth started offering Photo Holiday Greetings. I jumped on that one immediately and have never missed a year. I, personally, love getting Photo Christmas cards. I love seeing friends change from year to year. I love watching their families grow and their kids change. I save each and every one in that year's Christmas album. 

This year, I was looking for a photo to use for our card. I take thousands of photos so that shouldn't be too difficult. Except for the fact that I wanted something with all 6 of us in it. And Adam lives somewhere at the top of California, 12 hours away. What to do?

I found a photo of all 6 of us from Lucy's graduation which I kind of adored. 

I was happy with how we all looked and I thought our personalities totally showed through and as you can see, we were all in it. But Lucy vetoed it because she has since cut her hair short and that photo was "sooo last year." (Technically, it was this year, and she's actually talking about the school year calendar, but that's not important right now.)

I also really love this one from when Adam came down to visit on Easter. How cute are we?

But again, Lucy and the short hair thing. I have no photos of the six of us together and Lucy's short hair. What to do?

I had to design my own, of course.

Hey, I'm Cuban. I'm all about "resolviendo.*"  (*that's the Cuban way to say "improvising.") 

Merry Christmas from the Darbys! 

Marta's Christmas Gift Guide #2 - It's all about the image

As long and as far back as I can remember, everyone in my family has had an old school "cafetera" sitting on the stove. There might have been a few years (waaay back in the day) where my parents used a sock-thingy to make Cuban coffee. But for the most part, the stovetop cafetera has always been the must-have Cuban coffee making device.

And so, whenever I see this very familiar image of a stovetop Cuban cafetera it makes me totally happy. And makes me want whatever I find with a cafetera on it. (Shut up. I know.)

I do all my Christmas shopping online. All of it. It makes total sense for me in all my busy-ness, plus the stuff gets delivered to my door, all that's left for me to do is to wrap and tag. And voilá I'm done with Christmas shopping. Win-win.

Today I want to share some of the very cool online I-love-my-Cuban-cafetera finds with you.

From the super fun ChiChi and Flaco shop comes the Cafe con Leche! tshirt:

I love the clean simplicity of the design. 

From the very prolific and talented Cuban artist, Tony Mendoza, one of his most fun Fine Art Reproductions, Cuban-American:

I have been coveting this charm for my Pandora Charm Bracelet for ages. (Thinly veiled hint to whoever happens to be buying me something for Christmas, but that's not important right now.) From Santayana Jewelers in South Florida, the Cafetera bead charm:

My very artistic friend, Maria Soto Robbins has the most beautiful stuff. This one is a pin with her original art called Cuban Coffee and Lime. I am completely in love with it! You can also get her Cuban Coffee and Lime print at Fine Art America. 

 

And from the muy loco geniuses at Latin Laundry, comes the Artudito tshirt for the Cuban Star Wars lovers.

Me? I'm going to have another colada so I can get my second wind for wrapping all the fabulousness I just purchased.

P.S. You're welcome.  ;-)

It's Nochebuena! And everyone's invited. Again.

My big, fat, Cuban family consists of pretty much the same people year after year. Except for the occasional birth, marriage, or divorce, I'm still related to the same people.

It's still just "us." (Sometimes "us" can get to upwards of 40 people, but that's not important right now.)

We Cubans have our BIG Christmas celebration on December the 24th. Nochebuena. (Which translates to "Good Night.")

For as long as I can remember and many generations before me, my family, like most other Cuban families, look forward to roast pork and black beans and white rice and yuca con mojo and fried plantains on December 24th.

Every year, on December 24th, we celebrate our Nochebuena with that grand-there's-nothing-like-it Cuban feast.

Every year, on December 24th, we get together as one big family and exchange gifts.

Every year, on December 24th, we stay up late and drink Crema de Vie and enjoy the Christmas festivities.

Every year. On December 24th. For as long as I can remember. The date has always been the same. The menu has never varied. Neither has the guest list.

And yet......

I always make invitations. Which I send to the same people I've been related to all my life. Who have been celebrating Nochebuena on December the 24th for their entire lives, too. And who all know we'll be getting together for our annual Nochebuena Celebration on December 24th.

Chances are, we've even already discussed where the party is going to be held, too. (This year we're going to my sister, Alina's house.)

And yet.....

I send out invitations. Every year.

Nochebuena, 2006:

Nochebuena, 2007:

Nochebuena, 2009:

Nochebuena, 2010:

And now.....(drum roll, please)......

Nochebuena, 2011:

I'm quite proud of this year's invitations. Aren't they just beautiful? I'm so into the whole "subway art" thing right now. I created them in Photoshop CS5 and uploaded the file to my local Kinko's (excuse me, FedEx Kinkos) so they could print it on coated cardstock.

I'm seriously so very pleased. =D

I just mailed these out to all of my big, fat, Cuban family. Who live just a few miles from me. With whom I've been celebrating Nochebuena for all of my life. On December 24th.

"Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." ~Albert Einstein

Honestly, I know it's a little insane. But it's Cuban Christmas Insanity.

And to me, that's the very best kind. ;-)

Marta's Cuban Christmas Shopping Guide: La Cantina

I am not the type to start decorating in November for Christmas. I know many of you do. I choose not to. I am patient when it comes to the festive home decor. I wait until about a week before Christmas to start. It's my own personal preference. I think it's just that much more magical, but that's not important right now.

But I have already finished my shopping and have my cards ready to mail. I'm currently working on a gift book for my family and our Christmas video. I am busy!

Because I'm feeling so relieved that my shopping is done and am also feeling just a bit generous, I thought it would be fun to share some of the places I frequent online to find cool and geeky and Cuban gifts.

Today, let's talk Cantina.

Back in The Day, my family had the option of having hot meals delivered to our door via an ingenious method: La Cantina.

The metal container had 3 compartments and each held some wonderful culinary gift. The cantinas were packed and delivered hot around dinner time. Can you imagine? Hot Cuban food delivered at dinner time? I could weep from the beauty of it.

It was the ultimate take-out.

The last time I was in Miami, I picked up an old-school metal cantina. And I use it often as a lunch box or for sending leftovers to my daughter.

I always get asked where I found it, so for those of you who are 3,000 miles away from South Florida (where you can probably find these in every corner store) here's your cantina hook-up.

You can find this beauty online at The Cuban Food Market - click here for link.

Then there was the hard plastic one that I used after Thanksgiving. They call it a bento box. Who knew? - click here for link.

It seems they've discontinued these particular colors, and there are both small and large sizes to choose from.

The whole idea of the cantina makes me happy. It reminds me of my childhood and brings with it a kind of nostalgia. Comiendo de cantina? I wish someone would bring that back.

Who am I kidding? I wish someone would show up at my door at dinner time with hot Cuban food. *sigh*

Did you have cantinas delivered to your door? Tell me.

Our Favorite Orange County Portrait Photographer and Friend

I'm starting to think that I'm the last of a dying breed who waits until it's actually December (and usually half-way through!) to start decorating my home for Christmas. I explain that in great detail here.

But that doesn't mean I don't shop or do all the other preparations that make Christmas meaningful to me. It takes a bit of planning to make the actual Christmas celebrations come off looking effortless. (Also, I have quite an amazing family who all pitch in when the time comes, but that's not important right now.)

One of my favorite traditions is The Darby Family Christmas Card. Because there are six of us to schedule into one photo shoot, unless I use a photo taken sometime during the year, like I did in most of the following cards.

(Click on the years to read the actual posts.)

2006:

2007:

2008:

2009:

Last year, of course, we were proud to partake in The Great Christmas Card Photo Shoot of 2010:

Which brings me to the reason I'm writing this today. That wonderful photo of the six of us in the middle of the street in our red arm chair was taken by our wonderful next door neighbor and pro-photographer friend, Rafael. He managed to capture us in all our goofy gloriousness and also created some beautiful family portraits for us.

Exhibit A:

It was Rafael who also took Lucy's high school graduation portraits.

We have always been super pleased with Rafael's amazing work. Which is why I'm delighted to share this with you today.

For my friends in Orange County, Rafael, who I happen to believe is the very best Orange County Portrait Photographer is offering a very generous portrait special.

Only $45 for 20 minutes of his professional awesomeness! 

Call Rafael Photography at (949) 939-7286 to take advantage of this wonderful offer. 

Tell him Marta sent you. You can thank me by sending me your beautiful Christmas cards. ;-)

Teaching Generosity?

As you know if you've been reading this blog for a while, we have homeschooled our kids. I often say that one of the reasons we have chosen to homeschool is that we're not as concerned about their academics as we are concerned about their character.

We have attempted to teach them kindness, thoughtfulness, hospitality, and generosity - high values for us - mostly by modeling them as best as we know how. Because, seriously, has anyone ever learned these kinds of things by being lectured?

During this time of year we love participating in Samaritan's Purse Operation Christmas Child in which we thoughtfully and lovingly fill up a shoe box with gifts for a child on the other side of the world. We pray for our small recipient as we do so. We look forward to this small act of charity every year.

We get to go and shop for little items to put into the shoeboxes. As we're shopping, we think about what would bring a child joy.

"These trucks, Mom. I would have liked them as an 8 year old. Very cool."

"Let's get this little doll with an extra outfit. I think she's very sweet."

"Crayons! Modeling clay! Watercolors! YES!"

Shoeboxes are collected at various churches all over the country and then packed and disbursed to different places to kids around the world. What's very cool about this is that we get to track our shoebox to see where it ends up

From the Samaritan's Purse Website:

National Collection Week: November 14 - 21

Use an empty shoe box (standard size, please) or a small plastic container. You can wrap the box (lid separately), but wrapping is not required. Most importantly, pray for the child who will receive your gift.

Determine whether your gift will be for a boy or a girl, and the child’s age category: 2-4, 5-9, or 10-14. Print out the appropriate boy/girl label by downloading the artwork to the right. Mark the correct age category on the label, and tape the label to the top of your box.

Fill the box with a variety of gifts that will bring delight to a child. 

Please donate $7 or more for each shoe box you prepare to help cover shipping and other project costs. You can give online by using our “Follow Your Box Donation” option, or you can write a check to Samaritan’s Purse (note “OCC” on memo line) and place it in an envelope on top of the gift items inside your box. If you or your family are preparing more than one shoe box, please make one combined donation.

Place a rubber band around each closed shoe box and drop off at the Collection Center nearest you during our collection week, November 14-21.

For locations and hours of collection visit our Drop-Off Locations page where you can find the nearest place to take your shoe box by entering your ZIP Code or you can call 1-800-353-5949.

You can also send your shoe box gift to:
Samaritan’s Purse
Operation Christmas Child
801 Bamboo Road
Boone, NC 28607

*********************************************************

Our kids have all grown up to be very generous people. I say this, not to brag but as a matter of record. Apparently the lessons were picked up somehow. My theory, then is correct. Character values are more "caught than taught."

Do you support any charities? Tell me.

{Disclaimer: Samaritan's Purse is a charity we believe in and support. I have not received any compensation from them to write this post. It's my privilege and pleasure to tell you about them.}

El Dia de Los Reyes

Today, January 6th, marks the Feast of the Epiphany on the Catholic Church calendar.

If you were counting the 12 days of Christmas (from December 25th until the 5th of January - which was yesterday) you would just have received your 12 Lords a Leaping yesterday. (And would be frantically posting stuff on eBay, because really? Do you need seven swans a swimming AND FIVE golden rings? I'm just sayin.')

Back to January 6th. In Cuba and possibly most Hispanic countries, the children would be getting up and opening gifts this morning. The gifts were delivered by the Three Kings. We called it El Dia de Los Reyes. The Day of the Three Kings.

Santa Claus was a minor player in the Cuban Christmases of our youth. But we faithfully waited and counted down the 12 days until the eve of the arrival of the Three Kings. Los 3 Reyes Magos. The Magi. The 3 Wise Men.

As you know, they were late for the birth of Jesus. It was the Angels and the Shepherds who got the first round of celestial calls that a baby was born. The Magi followed the Star and arrived at the manger scene apparently as the 12 Lords were Leaping away. (No. Not really. I'm just trying to marry the 12 days of Christmas and the arrival of the Magi in your mind, but that's not important right now)

The cool thing was that there were three (!) of them and they had camels, people! And boy, could they carry stuff! So on the morning of the 6th of January, you would know that you had been visited. Because of the stacks of gifts. There were presents everywhere.

That was then. This is now. 2011.

My Christmas decorations are still up. And I confess, we didn't actually start decorating until the 22nd of December. (Some of you just fainted dead away, didn't you? I know. I know. You will be protesting: "Everyone decorates for Christmas on Thanksgiving weekend!" We don't. That just doesn't feel right to me. Don't judge.)

It makes Christmas much more fresh and magical and the following 12 days more contemplative.

And no, we don't put shoes out for the Magi. We still use the stockings. And who knows? Melchoir, King of Arabia, might have brought gold. Gaspar, King of Tarsus, might have dropped off some myrrh; and Balthasar, King of Ethiopia, was renowned for his magnificent frankincense. Matthew 2:11 (Of course, we knew them by name! They visited us every year on January 6th.)

Even if they don't show again this year, I'll still wait for them. I'll sit very still and hope that after these 50 long years in exile they will find my address again and leave a token of their visit.

And then tomorrow I will take down our Christmas decorations and be glad for another new year.

(And okay...yes, I did put out some dried grass for the camels....por si acaso...)  =D

Feliz Dia de Los Reyes!

Addendum 1/6/2011 @ 2:38 pm: I've been out all afternoon. And when I returned home, I found this:

I guess the waiting paid off. Thanks, Melchoir, Gaspar and Bathazar! Hasta el año que viene!