I spend time with each one, for the most part doing something they would like to do.
The girls are easy. They are 23 and 13. And we end up doing "chick stuff" together. Plus we have our standing date on Tuesday nights to watch Gilmore Girls at Amy's.
Adam, 20, is trickier to pin down, but he's always up for an occasional movie or concert.
My youngest, Jonathan will be turning 11 next week. He is the most difficult to find things in common with. So yesterday I went out of my way for Jonathan. We went to Legoland in Carlsbad and got year-round passes. He thought it was a Christmas Miracle. (cue the angelic choir here.) We took Daisy and Ben with us because it makes it more fun when there is a toddler to chase at inopportune times.
The point is, that my son felt blessed. As the youngest, he felt seen and heard. This was a perfect date for him. I was happy to oblige.
It turns out that the more time you spend with someone (quantity), the more rich moments there will be (quality). Who knew? ;-)
If it means I have to build an occasional Bionicle, then so be it.